The bundle project

So I follow a page on good Ol Facebook called the Star Legacy foundation. A organization that
Researches stillbirth.. Well I seen that they had this little things on their page advertising this amazing ladies product.. She makes bundles to the exact weight of your baby at birth.. so I had some made.. This lady is a huge blessing now I will never forget what it felt like to hold her in my arms.. so they are all done! I will be getting them in the mail soon! If you would like I put her blog info on the bottom you can read her story and how she got started.. 

CADENCE ELLEN DALTON, 5 LBS 10 OZ

http://emma-saperstein.blogspot.com/

Last picture

THIS WAS THE LAST PICTURE THAT I TOOK WHILE I WAS PREGNANT WITH MY BUTTON... THE VERY NEXT DAY MY WHOLE LIFE WAS FLIPPED UPSIDE DOWN.. I MISS YOU BUTTON.. I WILL FOREVER CARRY YOU IN MY HEART... AND I WILL NEVER SAY GOODBYE... JUST SEE YOU LATER

Mothers Day?

Mothers Day?

It used to be the day I told my mom how much I loved her.. The day I told her how grateful I am for her.. Last Mothers day I was pregnant and Life couldn't get any better..

This year I am terrified.. I don't even want to go through that day.. I just wish I could skip over the entire day.. I don't know if I'm strong enough.. Last year on mothers day I thought well next year I will have a nine month old baby to hold in my arms and someone to celebrate being a mother with.. I will get the chance to be a great mommy like my Mom has been to me.. And in the blink of an eye, that was taken right out from under me.. My darling girl will be in heaven and my arms will be empty.. This hurts..

Most people don't even know that I am a mother.. Will people even tell me Happy Mothers day? Or the people that do know will they forget about my Daughter? Will they forget that I too am a mother.. But my situation is just a little different.. I am a mommy to an angle.. I don't know how I'm supposed to get through this day.. Well I do.. I will just keep my head up and I will smile because My faith will get me through anything.. The Promise that God has made to me will help me keep it together.. I'm not saying it wont be hard but I know that with God's Love I can get through It..

I see all these commercials about "THIS MOTHERS DAY SALE" or "DON'T FORGET ABOUT MOM THIS MOTHERS DAY" I just want to turn off the TV or what ever its playing on.. It's just a reminder that my Button isn't in my arms..

But I guess I will hold onto Kale and Push through the day..

-Thanks-

TODAY AT CHURCH

So I really hope I don't cross the line by talking about what went on at church today... But Every time I go to church I always here someones amazing testimony. Or I hear how others have been blessed.. Its so amazing to hear about someone else's walk of faith..

Today we heard about one man that had lost his job which turned out to be a blessing in disguise.. He turned to the Lord and kept his faith.. Last Friday he got his job back.. That's the power of prayer..

We heard of another ladies granddaughter accepting Jesus into her life.. WOW.. She is four years old and already has so much faith..

One lady really touched my heart with her story.. She is a women in her 60's and is going to be adding a new baby into her life in 5 months.. The mother of the baby was going to have an abortion, and when this other women found out what was going on she contacted her and said I will take the baby.. Not realizing what she had just said at the time.. She kind of stopped and thought ugh can I really do this? She thought to herself and asked her Daughter and they both decided it was the right thing to do.. She is an amazing women with so much love in her heart.. No COINCIDENT THERE!! The Lord was speaking through her, he put those words in her mouth.. This women will forever be blessed.. (now don't quote me on this.. I could have some of the story mixed up)

SO today during praise and worship, I just bowed my head and started to cry.. I just started to pray.. Started to tell God how scared I am... Just asking him to help me with my fears and heal my heart.. Asking God to help me know when or if I will be ready to try this again.? Asking God just to give me answers that I need.. Asking God just to help me.. Just to tell me what I'm supposed to do..

Well after our service ended we were about to walk out and this man stopped my mom and I and said I would like to talk to you if I can.. So we said sure.. He said Cynthia I just wanted to tell you that during church today I was praying for you.. And Cynthia God told me that It's going to be ok.. You don't have to be scared.. God is going to bless you again.. He is going to replace what was taken from you.. .

I just broke down I just started to cry.. I was so grateful for those words.. I mean how did he know what I had just been praying about a few minutes earlier? What other explanation would make since? Because I'm pretty sure he isn't a mind reader.. Just when I thought my prayers were being heard.. I was reminded soon after.. God might not be giving me the answers but he put it in that mans heart to tell me.. He used another man to get the message to me.. He is a true man of GOD.. I will forever hang onto those words that he told me today..

God is working out the details of my life.. I just have to wait.. They will all come out soon..

Thanks for reading :) Have a Blessed Day!

Finally an update!!

I have so much to tell you all!!! I have been so busy lately, with the new job I haven't had time to write!!
Last month (April 15th) Cadence turned 8 months old! wow can you believe its been 8 months already? How did we make it this far? I ask myself that everyday.. It's been a crazy few months but we have grown so much stronger..

So I have a story to share.. I just cant wait!! I have to tell this one first!! I have so share!!

Ok, so this is yet another famous Karsen story..

The other day Karsen was at my parents house getting ready to go to Safford and visit some family. Well my Great Grandma Velma was going to be there and Karsen had never met her. So..... My mom was explaining to him who Grandma Velma was. helping his little three year old mind put the pieces together..

My Mom: Grandma Velma is papa Johnnys mom. Do you think Papa Johnny is old, Karsen?

Karsen: YES!

My Mom: Well that means Grandma Velma is even older.

While Karsen is trying to process things he is spinning his COWBOY ROPE is circles.. Finally he responds..

Karsen: Well you know what I'm going to do to her then?

While all these thing are running through my moms head she's thinking "what is this crazy kid going to say."

My Mom: What are you going to do Karsen?

Karsen's Response:  I'm going to ROPE her up to HEAVEN.. And then I'M GOING TO ROPE "BABY CADENCE" BY HER FEET AND PULL HER DOWN, cause I wanna play with her...

My mom couldn't say anything.. A speechless moment for sure.. This kid melts my heart every time!! You never what he's going to say.. But he always finds a way to remind us all how close BABY CADENCE really is!

*BLESSED ARE THE PURE IN HEART FOR THEY SHALL SEE GOD" MATTHEW 5:8